REFLECTIONS

Tuesday, December 16, 2025

Why Kerala is Called “God's own country”

Kerala, located in southwestern India along the Malabar Coast, is known as “God’s Own Country”for its lush landscapes, backwaters, and hill stations. Its capital is Thiruvananthapuram, and major cities include Kochi, Kozhikode, and Thrissur. Despite being relatively small in area, Kerala has a dense population of around 35–36 million (2025 estimate) and is notable for its high literacy rate, long life expectancy, and favorable human development indicators. The state is culturally diverse, with Hindus, Muslims, and Christians living in harmony, and Malayalam as the official language. Kerala’s economy relies on agriculture, services, tourism, and remittances from overseas workers. Famous for its festivals, classical arts, and Ayurveda, Kerala exemplifies the “Kerala Model of Develo

pment,” balancing social progress with natural beauty.

1. Natural Beauty & Geography

Unique landscape: Bordered by the Western Ghats on one side and the Arabian Sea on the other, Kerala has a rare combination of mountains, backwaters, beaches, and forests within a narrow strip of land.
Backwaters: The Vembanad Lake and interconnected canals are globally famous for their serene charm.
Climate: A tropical monsoon climate with lush greenery almost year-round.
Biodiversity: Rich in flora and fauna — home to Periyar, Wayanad, and Silent Valley national parks.

What Gives Kerala an Edge Over Other Indian States

1. Human Development Model

Kerala is often cited as the “Kerala Model of Development” — achieving high social indicators even with moderate per-capita income.

Indicator	Kerala	India Average
Literacy Rate	~96–97%	~77%
Life Expectancy	~75 years	~70 years
Infant Mortality (per 1000 births)	~6	~27
Gender Ratio (females/1000 males)	1084	1020

This shows Kerala has achieved near-developed-country social metrics within an Indian context.

2. Education & Literacy

First state in India to achieve 100% literacy (1991).
Strong focus on public education, including free schooling and high female literacy.
Widespread digital literacy initiatives (like KITE Victers and Akshaya Centers).

3. Healthcare

Universal healthcare model through public hospitals and community health centers.
Kerala handled crises (like Nipah virus outbreaks and COVID-19) with exceptional public health responses.
Health indicators comparable to many developed countries.

4. Social Equity & Empowerment

Strong Panchayati Raj (local governance) and decentralization policies.
Women play significant roles in governance through Kudumbashree (a women’s self-help network).
Relatively high gender equality and social awareness.

5. Remittances & Global Exposure

A large portion of Kerala’s population works abroad, especially in the Gulf countries.
This inflow of remittances has improved living standards, housing, and consumer power.
Cultural openness due to exposure to global lifestyles.

6. Tourism & Hospitality

Ranked among the top tourism destinations in Asia by National Geographic Traveler.
Focus on eco-tourism (Wayanad, Thekkady), wellness tourism (Ayurveda), and heritage tourism (Kochi, Thiruvananthapuram).
Kerala’s Responsible Tourism Mission is a global model for community-based tourism.

Kerala vs. Developed Countries: Where It Stands

Area	Kerala	Developed Countries
Human Development Index (HDI)	~0.78 (highest in India)	0.80–0.95 (OECD avg.)
Literacy	~96%	99%+
Life Expectancy	~75 yrs	78–83 yrs
Infant Mortality	6 per 1,000	3–5 per 1,000
Per Capita Income	~$3,000–$4,000	$40,000–$70,000
Public Health Access	Very strong (comparable)	Universal
Environmental Sustainability	Strong policies, but urbanization challenges	Mixed results globally

➡️ In social indicators, Kerala rivals many developed nations.
➡️ In economic output and infrastructure, it still lags — due to limited industrialization and employment opportunities.

In Summary

Kerala’s uniqueness lies in balancing:

High quality of life with limited resources
Cultural richness with modern governance
Human-centric policies with environmental consciousness

It’s not just “God’s Own Country” because of its scenery — but because it shows what human-centered, equitable development can look like in a developing world context.

We’ll compare Kerala with Norway, which often tops global Human Development Index (HDI) rankings, and with Japan, which is known for its long life expectancy and advanced healthcare.

This gives us a good contrast between a Nordic social democracy, an Asian developed nation, and Kerala’s human-centered model within a developing country.

Kerala vs. Norway vs. Japan — A Comparative Snapshot (2025 estimates)

Indicator	Kerala	Norway	Japan
HDI (Human Development Index)	~0.78	0.96	0.93
Literacy Rate	~96–97%	100%	99%
Life Expectancy	~75 years	83 years	85 years
Infant Mortality (per 1000 live births)	6	2	2
Maternal Mortality (per 100,000 births)	30	2	5
Per Capita Income (USD)	~$3,500	~$95,000	~$42,000
Gender Ratio (females per 1000 males)	1084	1022	1045
Access to Healthcare	Nearly universal (public system)	Universal	Universal
Access to Clean Water & Sanitation	~99%	100%	100%
Renewable Energy Share	~47% (mostly hydro)	~67%	~25%
Unemployment Rate	~5%	~3%	~2.5%
Poverty Rate	~7–8%	<1%	~1%
Public Education Quality	High	Very high	Very high
Governance Transparency	High (India’s best)	Very high	High
Cultural Diversity	Very high	Moderate	Moderate
Tourism Appeal	Natural & cultural	Scenic & natural	Heritage & modern blend

Analysis

1. Social Indicators: Comparable to the Best

Kerala’s education, literacy, and health standards are astonishingly close to those of developed countries:

Literacy and life expectancy are nearly on par.
Infant and maternal mortality are only marginally higher.
Public health systems are community-driven and accessible.

This is remarkable considering Kerala’s income level is over 20 times lower than Norway’s.

2. Economic Gap

Kerala’s GDP per capita is a fraction of developed nations’.
Limited industrialization and job creation have led to migration dependency — remittances from the Gulf drive the economy.
Service and tourism sectors thrive, but manufacturing and R&D are underdeveloped.

This means Kerala achieves “first-world social standards” on a “developing-world budget.”

3. Cultural & Social Capital

High social cohesion, community participation, and gender inclusion mirror Scandinavian models.
Strong grassroots democracy (Panchayati Raj) encourages citizen engagement similar to Nordic participatory governance.

4. Environmental & Sustainability Edge

Kerala’s ecological awareness and green cover outperform most Indian states.
Its renewable energy mix and disaster resilience (flood management, climate adaptation) have global recognition.
Yet, urban waste management and coastal erosion remain major challenges.

5. Where Kerala Still Lags

Challenge	Reason
Per Capita Income	Dependence on remittances, low local job creation
Infrastructure	Limited industrial and transport development
Fiscal Stress	High welfare spending, limited tax base
Innovation & R&D	Few high-tech industries or global research hubs

In Global Terms

If Kerala were a country, it would rank:

In the top 50 globally on HDI (comparable to countries like Malaysia or Chile).
Top 10 in literacy and gender ratio.
Among the best in the developing world in health and social welfare.

Economically, it would be a middle-income nation, but socially, it performs like a developed one.

Summary Table: The “Kerala Model” in Perspective

Aspect	Developed-Country Equivalent	Remarks
Education	Finland	Universal access, high literacy
Health	Japan	Public-driven, community-oriented
Governance	Norway	Decentralized, transparent
Gender Equality	Sweden	High empowerment via Kudumbashree
Economy	Philippines / Malaysia	Service & remittance-based
Sustainability	Costa Rica	Green, but vulnerable to climate change

In Essence

Kerala proves that:

“You don’t need to be rich to be well-developed — you need to be equitable, educated, and efficient.”

It’s not yet Norway or Japan in terms of wealth, but it feels like one in terms of human dignity, education, and awareness

Friday, November 14, 2025

NBA Program Outcomes (POs) – Revised 2025

PO	Title	Description	Mapped WK (Knowledge & Attitude)
PO1	Engineering Knowledge	Apply mathematics, science, and engineering fundamentals to solve complex problems.	WK1, WK2, WK3, WK4
PO2	Problem Analysis	Identify, formulate, research, and analyze complex engineering problems.	WK1, WK2, WK3, WK4
PO3	Design / Development of Solutions	Design solutions considering health, safety, societal, and environmental factors.	WK5
PO4	Investigation	Use research-based methods (experiments, data analysis, interpretation) to provide valid conclusions.	WK8
PO5	Engineering Tool Usage	Select and apply modern engineering tools, software, and techniques, recognizing limitations.	WK2, WK6
PO6	The Engineer & The World	Analyze societal, environmental, sustainability, and economic impacts of engineering solutions.	WK1, WK5, WK7
PO7	Ethics	Apply ethical principles, commit to professional ethics, human values, and diversity.	WK9
PO8	Individual & Collaborative Team Work	Function effectively as an individual and in diverse, multi-disciplinary teams.	WK7, WK9 (interpretive)
PO9	Communication	Communicate effectively and inclusively with engineering community and society.	WK8, WK9 (interpretive)
PO10	Project Management & Finance	Apply engineering management and financial principles to manage projects in multi-disciplinary environments.	WK6 (interpretive)
PO11	Life‑Long Learning	Recognize need for and engage in independent, continuous learning to adapt to evolving technologies.	WK8

✅ Key Notes:

WK1-WK9 correspond to the NBA’s Knowledge & Attitude profiles for graduates.
Some POs (teamwork, communication, project management) are mapped interpretively, as WKs are not strictly one-to-one.
This table aligns with NBA SAR 2025 Tier-I and GAPC 4.0.
Institutes can use this directly for CO–PO mapping, curriculum design, or internal assessments.

Absolutely! Let’s break it down carefully.

🧠 What are WKs (Knowledge & Attitude Profiles) in NBA?

In the NBA (National Board of Accreditation) 2025 SAR / GAPC 4.0, WKs are Graduate Attributes that describe what a student should know (Knowledge) and how they should behave or think (Attitude) after completing a program. They serve as the bridge between the curriculum, learning outcomes, and program outcomes (POs).

Think of WKs as the building blocks of graduate competence.

1️⃣ Structure of WKs

W = Knowledge: Technical, theoretical, or practical knowledge a student must acquire.
K = Attitude: Mindset, approach, or soft skills needed to use that knowledge effectively.

Each PO is mapped to one or more WKs. For example:

PO	Example WK Mapping
PO1 – Engineering Knowledge	WK1, WK2, WK3, WK4 → Students learn theory, mathematics, science, and engineering principles.
PO7 – Ethics	WK9 → Students develop professional ethics, human values, and social responsibility.
PO11 – Life‑Long Learning	WK8 → Students gain critical thinking, research, and adaptive learning ability.

2️⃣ Why WKs are Important

They standardize what a graduate should know and how they should behave, regardless of college.
Help in curriculum design: You map courses and assessments to WKs so students develop the necessary knowledge and attitudes.
Help in PO–CO mapping: Each Course Outcome (CO) should contribute to one or more WKs, which in turn support POs.
Assessment: When NBA evaluates a program, WKs are used to check if students truly acquire the intended knowledge and mindset.

3️⃣ Examples of WKs

Some common WKs defined in NBA documents:

WK Number	Focus / Description
WK1	Basic sciences, engineering fundamentals, mathematical knowledge
WK2	Problem-solving methods, analytical skills
WK3	Technical skills, modeling, simulation
WK4	Experimentation, data interpretation
WK5	Design & innovation, creative thinking
WK6	Practical engineering tools, management
WK7	Societal, environmental, sustainability awareness
WK8	Critical thinking, independent learning, research aptitude
WK9	Ethics, professional behavior, teamwork, communication

So when a PO is “Life-Long Learning,” it primarily maps to WK8, because independent, adaptive learning requires critical thinking and a research mindset.

4️⃣ Analogy

Think of WKs as ingredients and POs as dishes:

Each dish (PO) needs certain ingredients (WKs).
Different dishes can share ingredients.
The recipe (curriculum + COs) ensures the student gets all the ingredients to become a well-rounded engineer.

Perfect! Here’s a clear visual/conceptual diagram for POs and WKs, which helps understand how WKs feed into POs. I’ll describe it so you can picture it, or I can generate a graphic for you next.

🌐 Conceptual Diagram: POs and WKs

           [WK1]  [WK2]  [WK3]  [WK4]
             |      |      |      |
             +------|------|------+
                    |
                [PO1 – Engineering Knowledge]
                    |
            -------------------------
           |            |           |
      [PO2] – Problem  [PO3] –   [PO4] –
               Analysis  Design    Investigation
           |            |           |
        [WK1,2,3...]   [WK5]      [WK8]
           |
        [PO5] – Engineering Tools
           |
        [WK2,6]
           .
           .
           .
[PO6] The Engineer & World → WK1, WK5, WK7
[PO7] Ethics → WK9
[PO8] Teamwork → WK7, WK9
[PO9] Communication → WK8, WK9
[PO10] Project Mgmt → WK6
[PO11] Life-Long Learning → WK8

🔹 How to Read This Diagram

Top Layer (WKs) – Knowledge & Attitude profiles, the raw skills and mindset students acquire from courses.
Middle Layer (POs) – Program Outcomes, which are bigger graduate competencies built using WKs.
Arrows / Connections – Show which WKs contribute to which POs. One WK can contribute to multiple POs, and one PO can require multiple WKs.
Curriculum Mapping – In practice, each course’s outcomes (COs) are mapped to WKs. Completing courses → develops WKs → fulfills POs → produces competent graduates.

Adapted from Chatgpt for personal use

Monday, November 10, 2025

Shroud of Nationalism at Crossroads

Introduction

Nationalism is an ideology and political movement that emphasizes loyalty, devotion, and allegiance to one’s nation. It centers on the belief that a group of people who share a common language, culture, history, or ethnicity should form an independent nation or maintain strong unity within an existing nation.

Nationalism can be seen as a shroud that protects a nation’s people, culture, and values from being eroded by external influences. Like a cloth that shields something precious, nationalism wraps a community in a sense of shared identity and purpose. It guards traditions, language, and history, reminding people of who they are and where they come from. In times of crisis or foreign domination, nationalism often becomes the force that preserves a nation’s dignity and unity. Though it can sometimes be misused, in its purest form nationalism serves as a protective covering — not to isolate, but to shelter a people’s spirit until they are strong enough to stand freely in the world.

Historic background

The history of Indian nationalism is a rich and complex story of how people across diverse languages, religions, and regions came together to challenge foreign rule and build a modern nation. It developed gradually—from early cultural pride and reform movements to a full-fledged struggle for independence and national unity.

Indian nationalism is the movement that united people across the subcontinent in their struggle for freedom from foreign rule. It began as a desire for social and cultural reform, inspired by thinkers and leaders who promoted education, equality, and national pride. These early efforts nurtured a sense of identity and unity among Indians.

The nationalist movement grew with the formation of organizations that aimed to represent Indian interests and seek greater participation in governance. Leaders within these groups debated between peaceful negotiation and more assertive methods to demand self-rule. Movements advocating nonviolent resistance, civil disobedience, and social unity mobilized millions of people, giving the struggle a mass character.

Throughout its course, Indian nationalism combined political, social, and cultural elements, drawing people from different communities together. Ultimately, it succeeded in achieving independence and leaving a legacy of unity, resilience, and pride in the nation.

1. The Congress-era “shroud of nationalism”

During the freedom struggle and the early decades after independence, the Indian National Congress promoted a form of inclusive, civic nationalism — based on:

Anti-colonial unity: The primary unifying force was opposition to British rule.
Secularism and pluralism: Leaders like Nehru, Gandhi, and Patel emphasized an idea of India that transcended religion, caste, and region.
Democratic and developmental ideals: The focus was on building a modern, industrial, democratic state where all communities belonged.

This “shroud” of nationalism was civic and institutional — tied to the project of nation-building and the idea of a diverse, secular India.

2. The emerging “cultural–religious nationalism”

In more recent decades — particularly under the Bharatiya Janata Party (BJP) and its ideological affiliates (like the RSS) — nationalism has taken on a more cultural and religious tone:

Hindu cultural identity: The BJP’s rhetoric often foregrounds Hindu civilization, values, and symbols as central to Indian identity.
Historical reassertion: Emphasis on correcting perceived historical wrongs, reclaiming pride in India’s ancient heritage, and resisting “appeasement politics.”
Mass mobilization: Religion, festivals, and cultural narratives are used as powerful unifying forces, often appealing emotionally and symbolically rather than institutionally.

This has led to a cultural homogenization of nationalism — where being “truly Indian” is increasingly equated with a particular cultural or religious identity, rather than civic belonging.

3. Implications of this shift

Unity through identity: The new nationalism unites people through shared culture and belief rather than shared democratic ideals.
Exclusionary tendencies: It can marginalize minorities or dissenters who don’t fit into the dominant cultural narrative.
Changing political discourse: National pride, defense of religion, and historical revisionism have become key electoral themes, replacing older issues like development or socialism.
Erosion of secularism: The constitutional idea of India as a secular republic faces strain as politics becomes increasingly religion-inflected.

If you’d like, I can help you turn this into a short essay, debate argument, or analytical paragraph for an assignment or exam — would you like me to do that?

Saturday, May 11, 2024

Need for a compromise between AI and NI

The history of technological development is riddled with instances of unforeseen negative consequences. It's imperative that we learn from past mistakes and approach each phase of advancement and development with caution. There is a growing concern among some people about the potential threat of Artificial Intelligence (AI) to Natural Intelligence (NI). This indeed is a significant topic of discussion in the modern era. It's crucial to strike a balance between the development of AI and the nurturing of our own innate human abilities.

AI undoubtedly offers numerous benefits and has the potential to revolutionize various aspects of our lives, from healthcare to transportation to education. However, it's essential to proceed with caution and ensure that the development of AI is guided by ethical principles and a deep understanding of its potential impacts. One key consideration is the preservation and enhancement of NI.

While AI can perform tasks with remarkable efficiency and accuracy, it lacks the creativity, empathy, and intuition that are integral to human intelligence. Therefore, investing in the development and cultivation of NI remains crucial. It's imperative that we learn from past mistakes and approach the advancement of AI with a thoughtful and responsible mind set. This includes addressing concerns such as job displacement, privacy infringement, and the potential for AI to aggravate existing societal inequalities. Some considerations on managing future AI development preserving and enhancing NI.

1. Ethical Guidelines and Regulation: Establishing clear ethical guidelines and regulatory frameworks is crucial to ensure that AI development prioritizes human well-being and aligns with societal values. This can involve setting standards for transparency, accountability, fairness, and privacy in AI systems.

2. Responsible AI Design: AI systems should be designed with a focus on augmenting human capabilities rather than replacing them entirely. This involves incorporating principles of human-centered design, ensuring that AI complements and enhances the strengths of NI rather than undermining them.

3. Investment in Education and Training: Fostering NI requires ongoing investment in education and training programs that cultivate critical thinking, creativity, empathy, and other essential human skills. This can help individuals adapt to the changing landscape of work and technology and remain resilient in the face of AI advancements.

4. Collaboration between AI and NI: Promoting collaboration between AI and NI can lead to more effective and beneficial outcomes lead to more effective and beneficial outcomes. This involves integrating AI technologies into educational and professional settings to support learning, problem-solving, and decision-making while preserving the unique contributions of NI.

5. Anticipating and Addressing Risks: Proactively identifying and addressing potential risks associated with AI development is essential. This includes concerns such as job displacement, bias and discrimination, security vulnerabilities, and the ethical implications of AI-powered decision-making.

6. Public Engagement and Dialogue: Encouraging public engagement and dialogue on the ethical, social, and cultural implications of AI can foster awareness, understanding, and accountability. This can involve creating platforms for open discussion, soliciting feedback from diverse stakeholders, and involving the public in decision-making processes related to AI development.

7. Managing the Pace of AI: In terms of managing the pace of AI development, it's essential to prioritize human well-being and ensure that AI serves as a tool for augmenting human capabilities rather than replacing them entirely. This may involve implementing regulations and guidelines to govern the ethical use of AI and promote transparency and accountability in its deployment.The history of technological development is riddled with instances of unforeseen negative consequences. It's imperative that we learn from past mistakes and approach each phase of advancement and development with caution. There is a growing concern among some people about the potential threat of Artificial Intelligence (AI) to Natural Intelligence (NI). This indeed is a significant topic of discussion in the modern era. It's crucial to strike a balance between the development of AI and the nurturing of our own innate human abilities.

One key consideration is the preservation and enhancement of NI. While AI can perform tasks with remarkable efficiency and accuracy, it lacks the creativity, empathy, and intuition that are integral to human intelligence. Therefore, investing in the development and cultivation of NI remains crucial. It's imperative that we learn from past mistakes and approach the advancement of AI with a thoughtful and responsible mind set. This includes addressing concerns such as job displacement, privacy infringement, and the potential for AI to aggravate existing societal inequalities.

By implementing these strategies and approaches, we can manage the future development of AI in a way that maximizes its benefit while mitigating its potential risks to Natural Intelligence. It requires a concerted effort from the policy makers, technologist, educators and society as a whole to ensure that AI serves as a force for positive change and advancement.

Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Chanda Kochhar's Letter To Her Daughter

ICICI Bank CEO and MD Chanda Kocchar is an inspiration to women everywhere. Despite having a top position in the corporate world, at home she is a doting mother, which has made her daughter question how she balances work and life.

bcgperspectives.com
In her heartfelt letter to her daughter, Kocchar shares her experiences in life, as well as how she learnt from the discipline that her parents raised her with. She stresses on how family always comes first and how pressure from work must never pull us down.
The letter is from the book 'Legacy: Letters from eminent parents to their daughters' compiled by Sudha Menon.
Dear Aarti,
It makes me feel so proud today to see you standing in front of me as a confident young woman right on the threshold of an exciting journey through life. I am looking forward to seeing you grow and flourish in the years ahead.
This moment has also brought back memories of my own journey, and the life lessons I learnt along the way. When I think of those times, I realize that most of these lessons were actually learnt in my childhood, mostly through examples set by my parents. The values that they instilled in my formative years gave me the foundation on which I try to live my life even today.

impnotice.blogspot.com
Our parents treated all three of us - two sisters and a brother - equally. When it came to education, or our future plans, there was no discrimination between us based on our gender. Your grandparents always had the same message for the three of us - that it was important to focus on what gave us satisfaction and to work towards it with utmost dedication. That early initiation enabled us to develop into confident individuals capable of taking decisions independently. This also helped me when I started out on my own journey of self- discovery.
I was only a young girl of 13 when my father passed away from a sudden heart attack, leaving us unprepared to take on life without him. We had been protected from life's challenges so far. But without warning, all that changed overnight. And my mother, who had been a homemaker till then, faced the responsibility of raising three children all on her own. It was then that we realized how strong she was and how determined to do her duty in the best possible manner. Slowly, she discovered a flair for designing and textiles, found herself a job with a small firm, and quickly made herself indispensable to them. It must have been challenging for her to shoulder the responsibility of bringing up her family single- handed, but she never let us feel like it was a task for her. She worked hard till she saw all of us through college and we became independent. I never knew that my mother had such a wealth of self-assurance and belief within her.

weddingsutra.com
As a parent with a full time job, one must not let work affect the way you relate to your family. Remember the time you were studying in the US and the announcement of my becoming MD and CEO of ICICI was splashed across all newspapers? I remember the mail you wrote to me a couple of days later. 'You never made us realize that you had such a demanding, successful and stressful career. At home, you were just our mother,' you wrote in your email. Live your life in the same way, my darling.
I also learnt from my mother that it is very important to have the ability to handle difficult situations and keep moving forward in life, no matter what. Even today I can remember the equanimity and calmness with which she handled the crisis on hand when my father passed away. You have to handle the challenges and emerge stronger from them, rather than allow them to bog you down. I remember how, in late 2008, we were faced with a situation where ICICI Bank's survival was in jeopardy in the face of a global economic meltdown. The situation was being analysed with a hawk's eye by major media platforms and debated widely in the public space… I got down to work, systematically communicating with all stakeholders - from the smallest depositor to the sophisticated investors, and from regulators to the government - the bank was sound and its exposure to these institutions involved a small portion of its assets.
I understood their concern because so many of them feared that their hard earned savings in our bank could be at risk. I also advised staff across the bank's various branches to lend a sympathetic ear to those depositors who turned up to withdraw their money, telling them to also offer the depositors a seat and a glass of water while they waited. And though, depositors were welcome to withdraw their money if they wanted to, our staff also took care to explain to them that it would not help them to take their money away, because there was no real crisis situation.

rediff.com
It was during this period that I took a couple of hours off one day to attend your brother's squash tournament. I did not know it then, but my very presence at the tournament went a long way in reinstalling customer confidence in the bank. A few mothers at the tournament came and asked me if I was Chanda Kochhar from ICICI Bank and when I replied in the affirmative they said that if I could still find time to attend a tournament in the midst of a crisis, it meant that the bank was in safe hands and they need not worry about their money!
It was also from my mother that I learnt the importance of adapting to circumstances and not being afraid of the unknown. While working hard for my career, I looked after my family, and have been there for my mother and in-laws when they needed me around. They reciprocated in kind with their unconditional love and support for my career. Remember that relationships are important and have to be nurtured and cherished. Also keep in mind that a relationship is a two way street, so be ready to give a relationship just as you would expect the other person to be giving to you.

daily.bhaskar.com
My career would not have progressed the way it did were it not for your father who never once complained about the time I spent away from home. Your father and I nurtured our relationship despite the fact that we were both busy with our own careers, and I am confident you will do the same with your partner, when the time comes. If you had complained and whined about my extended absence from home, I would never have had the heart to make a career for myself. I am blessed with a great and supportive family and I really hope you too will be as fortunate when you set out on your own!
I remember the day your board exams were about to commence. I had taken leave from work so that I could take you to the examination hall myself. When you realized I was coming, you told me how you were used to going for your exams alone for so many years. It hurt me to hear you say that, but I also think in some ways, having a working mother made you much more independent from a very young age itself. You not only became independent, but also stepped into the nurturer's role for your younger brother and never let him miss my presence. I learnt to have trust and faith in you and you have now grown into a wonderful, independent woman. I now use the same principle at work to make our growing population of younger talent take on larger responsibilities.

weddingsutra.com

I believe in fate but I also believe that hard work and diligence plays a very important role in our lives. In a larger sense, we all write our own destiny. Take destiny in your own hands, dream of what you want to achieve, and write it in your own way. As you go ahead in life, I want you to climb the path to success one step at a time. Aim for the sky, but move slowly, enjoying every step along the way. It is all those little steps that make the journey complete.
As you go forward, you will sometimes have to take difficult decisions, decisions that others might scorn at. But you must have the courage to stand up for what you believe in. Make sure you have that conviction to do what you know is right, and once you have it, don't let skeptics distract you from your path.

Economic Times

Aarti, there is no limit to what a determined mind can achieve, but in achieving your goal, don't compromise on the values of fair play and honesty. Don't cut corners or compromise to achieve your dreams. Remember to be sensitive to the feelings of people around you. And remember, if you don't allow stress to overtake you, it will never become an issue in your life.
Remember that good times and bad times will be part of your life equally, and you have to learn to handle both with equanimity. Make the most of life's opportunities and learn from every opportunity, and challenge that life brings along.

Lovingly yours, Mumma

Sunday, March 8, 2015

How I Saved My Marriage

How I Saved My Marriage

By: Richard Paul Evans

· February 09, 2015

Richard Paul Evans is the #1 New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of The Christmas Box and the Michael Vey series. He is also the author of the New York Times bestselling The Walk series, the story of a man who, upon losing his wife, home and business, decides to walk across America

image:
http://www.richardpaulevans.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/savemarriageblog.jpg

My oldest daughter, Jenna, recently said to me, “My greatest fear as a child was that you and mom would get divorced. Then, when I was twelve, I decided that you fought so much that maybe it would be better if you did.” Then she added with a smile. “I’m glad you guys figured things out.”

For years my wife Keri and I struggled. Looking back, I’m not exactly sure what initially drew us together, but our personalities didn’t quite match up. And the longer we were married the more extreme the differences seemed. Encountering “fame and fortune” didn’t make our marriage any easier. In fact, it exacerbated our problems. The tension between us got so bad that going out on book tour became a relief, though it seems we always paid for it on re-entry. Our fighting became so constant that it was difficult to even imagine a peaceful relationship. We became perpetually defensive, building emotional fortresses around our hearts. We were on the edge of divorce and more than once we discussed it.

I was on book tour when things came to a head. We had just had another big fight on the phone and Keri had hung up on me. I was alone and lonely, frustrated and angry. I had reached my limit. That’s when I turned to God. Or turned on God. I don’t know if you could call it prayer–maybe shouting at God isn’t prayer, maybe it is–but whatever I was engaged in I’ll never forget it. I was standing in the shower of the Buckhead, Atlanta Ritz-Carlton yelling at God that marriage was wrong and I couldn’t do it anymore. As much as I hated the idea of divorce, the pain of being together was just too much. I was also confused. I couldn’t figure out why marriage with Keri was so hard. Deep down I knew that Keri was a good person. And I was a good person. So why couldn’t we get along? Why had I married someone so different than me? Why wouldn’t she change?

Finally, hoarse and broken, I sat down in the shower and began to cry. In the depths of my despair powerful inspiration came to me. You can’t change her, Rick. You can only change yourself. At that moment I began to pray. If I can’t change her, God, then change me. I prayed late into the night. I prayed the next day on the flight home. I prayed as I walked in the door to a cold wife who barely even acknowledged me. That night, as we lay in our bed, inches from each other yet miles apart, the inspiration came. I knew what I had to do.

The next morning I rolled over in bed next to Keri and asked, “How can I make your day better?”

Keri looked at me angrily. “What?”

“How can I make your day better?”

“You can’t,” she said. “Why are you asking that?”

“Because I mean it,” I said. “I just want to know what I can do to make your day better.”

She looked at me cynically. “You want to do something? Go clean the kitchen.”

She likely expected me to get mad. Instead I just nodded. “Okay.” I got up and cleaned the kitchen.

The next day I asked the same thing. “What can I do to make your day better?”

Her eyes narrowed. “Clean the garage.”

I took a deep breath. I already had a busy day and I knew she had made the request in spite. I was tempted to blow up at her. Instead I said, “Okay.” I got up and for the next two hours cleaned the garage. Keri wasn’t sure what to think.

The next morning came. “What can I do to make your day better?”

“Nothing!” she said. “You can’t do anything. Please stop saying that.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “But I can’t. I made a commitment to myself. What can I do to make your day better?”

“Why are you doing this?”

“Because I care about you,” I said. “And our marriage.”

The next morning I asked again. And the next. And the next. Then, during the second week, a miracle occurred. As I asked the question Keri’s eyes welled up with tears. Then she broke down crying. When she could speak she said, “Please stop asking me that. You’re not the problem. I am. I’m hard to live with. I don’t know why you stay with me.”

I gently lifted her chin until she was looking in my eyes. “It’s because I love you,” I said. “What can I do to make your day better?”

“I should be asking you that.”

“You should,” I said. “But not now. Right now, I need to be the change. You need to know how much you mean to me.”

She put her head against my chest. “I’m sorry I’ve been so mean.”

“I love you,” I said.

“I love you,” she replied.

“What can I do to make your day better?”

She looked at me sweetly. “Can we maybe just spend some time together?”

I smiled. “I’d like that.”

I continued asking for more than a month. And things did change. The fighting stopped. Then Keri began asking, “What do you need from me? How can I be a better wife?”

The walls between us fell. We began having meaningful discussions on what we wanted from life and how we could make each other happier. No, we didn’t solve all our problems. I can’t even say that we never fought again. But the nature of our fights changed. Not only were they becoming more and more rare, they lacked the energy they’d once had. We’d deprived them of oxygen. We just didn’t have it in us to hurt each other anymore.

Keri and I have now been married for more than thirty years. I not only love my wife, I like her. I like being with her. I crave her. I need her. Many of our differences have become strengths and the others don’t really matter. We’ve learned how to take care of each other and, more importantly, we’ve gained the desire to do so.

Marriage is hard. But so is parenthood and keeping fit and writing books and everything else important and worthwhile in my life. To have a partner in life is a remarkable gift. I’ve also learned that the institution of marriage can help heal us of our most unlovable parts. And we all have unlovable parts.

Through time I’ve learned that our experience was an illustration of a much larger lesson about marriage. The question everyone in a committed relationship should ask their significant other is, “What can I do to make your life better?” That is love. Romance novels (and I’ve written a few) are all about desire and happily-ever-after, but happily-ever-after doesn’t come from desire–at least not the kind portrayed in most pulp romances. Real love is not to desire a person, but to truly desire their happiness–sometimes, even, at the expense of our own happiness. Real love is not to make another person a carbon copy of one’s self. It is to expand our own capabilities of tolerance and caring, to actively seek another’s well being. All else is simply a charade of self-interest.

I’m not saying that what happened to Keri and me will work for everyone. I’m not even claiming that all marriages should be saved. But for me, I am incredibly grateful for the inspiration that came to me that day so long ago. I’m grateful that my family is still intact and that I still have my wife, my best friend, in bed next to me when I wake in the morning. And I’m grateful that even now, decades later, every now and then, one of us will still roll over and say, “What can I do to make your day better.” Being on either side of that question is something worth waking up for.

Read more at http://www.richardpaulevans.com/saved-marriage

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Tuesday, April 15, 2014

വാഴ്ത്തപെട്ട എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ.

കേരളസഭ കത്തോലിക്കാസഭയ്‌ക്ക്‌ നല്‌കുന്ന, വാഴ്‌ത്തപ്പെട്ടവരുടെ ഗണത്തിലേക്ക്‌ ഉയര്‍ത്തപ്പെടുന്ന, അഞ്ചാമത്തെ വ്യക്തിയാണ്‌ വാഴ്‌്‌ത്തപ്പെട്ട എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ. കേരളത്തിന്റ ഓരോ മക്കിലും മൂലയിലുമളളവര്‍ക്ക്‌ പരിചിതയല്ലായിരുന്നുവെങ്കിലും തൃശ്ശൂര്‍ അതിരൂപതയിലെ ഒല്ലുര്‍ നാട്ടിലേയും പരിസരങ്ങളിലേയും ഓരോ വ്യക്തിയ്‌ക്കും സുപരിചിതയായിരുന്നു 'ചേര്‍പ്പുക്കാരന്റെ പൂണ്യപ്പെട്ട കന്യാസ്‌ത്രി, പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥിക്കുന്ന അമ്മ, ചലിക്കുന്ന സക്രാരി' എന്നൊക്കെയുളള അപരനാമങ്ങളില്‍ അറിയപ്പെട്ടിരുന്ന വാ. എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ. അവരുടെ ഹൃദയങ്ങളില്‍ അമ്മ ഇന്നും ജീവിക്കുന്നു.
1877 ഒക്ടോബര്‍ 17 ന്‌ കാട്ടൂര്‍ എന്ന ഗ്രാമത്തില്‍ എലുവത്തിങ്കല്‍ തറവാട്ടില്‍ അന്തോണിയ്‌ക്കും കുഞ്ഞേത്തിയ്‌ക്കും ആറ്റുനോറ്റ്‌ കാത്തിരുന്ന കടിഞ്ഞുല്‍ സന്താനത്തിന്‌ ജന്മം നല്‍കാന്‍ സാധിച്ചു, അതും കൊന്തമാതാവിന്റെ തിരുന്നാള്‍ ദിവസം. സമ്പന്നമായ കുടുംബമായിരുന്നതുകൊണ്ട്‌ അവരുടെ പൊന്നുംകുടമായ റോസയെ ആര്‍ഭാടതയില്‍ വളര്‍ത്തി. തന്റെ അന്തസ്സും, വിലയും നിലയും കാത്തുസംരക്ഷിക്കാന്‍ എന്തും ചെയ്യുവാന്‍ പിതാവ്‌ അന്തോണി മടിച്ചില്ല. എല്ലാം നിറകണ്ണുകളോടെ നോക്കിനില്‍ക്കാനെ അമ്മ കുഞ്ഞേത്തിക്കായുളളു. അമ്മയുടെ പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥനാനിര്‍ഭരമായ കണ്ണുകളില്‍ നിന്ന്‌ അവള്‍ എല്ലാം മനസ്സിലാക്കി. അമ്മയുടെ മടിയിലിരുന്ന്‌ ഒത്തിരി പഠിച്ചു. ദൈവത്തെക്കുറിച്ചും, യേശുനാഥനെക്കുറിച്ചും, അവിടുത്തെ പരിശുദ്ധ അമ്മയെകുറിച്ചും. അങ്ങനെ ദൈവസ്‌നേഹത്തില്‍ അവള്‍ വളരുകയും ആ ദൈവത്തിന്‌ സ്വയം സമര്‍പ്പിക്കുകയും ചെയ്‌തു.
കുടുംബപാരമ്പര്യമനുസരിച്ച്‌ റോസയെ കെട്ടിച്ചയ്‌ക്കുവാന്‍ വീട്ടുകാര്‍ തീരുമാനിച്ചു. ഒരു കന്യാസ്‌ത്രിയാകണം എന്ന തന്റെ ആഗ്രഹം അല്‌പം വിറയെലോടെയാണെങ്കിലും തന്റെ മാതാപിതാക്കളെ അവള്‍ അറിയിച്ചു. മാതാപിതാക്കള്‍ക്ക്‌ അത്‌ സമ്മതമല്ലായിരുന്നു. എങ്കിലും ദൈവഭയമുളളവരായിരുന്നതിനാല്‍ റോസയ്‌ക്ക്‌ പകരം അവളുടെ അനുജത്തി വലുതാകുമ്പോള്‍ മഠത്തില്‍ അയ്‌ക്കാമെന്ന്‌ നിശ്ചയിച്ചു. എന്നാല്‍ അനുജത്തി ജീവിതത്തില്‍ നിന്നും അനന്തതയിലേക്ക്‌ യാത്രയായി. അങ്ങനെ റോസയുടെ കന്യാമഠത്തിലേക്കുളള വഴി തുറന്നുകിട്ടി.
1888 ഒക്ടോബര്‍ 24ന്‌ മാതാപിതാക്കളുടെ ആശീര്‍വാദത്തോടെ കുനമ്മാവ്‌ ബോര്‍ഡിംഗിലേക്ക്‌ റോസ യാത്രയായി. ബാല്യം മുതലെ അനാരോഗ്യം അവളുടെ കൂടെപ്പിറപ്പായിരുന്നു. ബോര്‍ഡിംഗ്‌ ജീവിതം അവളുടെ ശരീരത്തെ കൂടുതല്‍ ബലഹീനമാക്കി. എങ്കിലും അതൊന്നും റോസയെ തളര്‍ത്തിയില്ല. കാരണം അവളുടെ ലക്ഷ്യം യേശുവായിരുന്നു. നീണ്ട ഒമ്പത്‌ വര്‍ഷം ആ ബോര്‍ഡിംഗില്‍ അവള്‍ പ്രത്യാശയോടെ കാത്തിരുന്നു. 1896 ല്‍ തൃശ്ശൂര്‍ വികാരിയാത്ത്‌ സ്ഥാപിതമായപ്പോള്‍, അവിടെ ഒരു കന്യാമഠസ്ഥാപിക്കാന്‍ മേനാച്ചേരി ബഹു. യോഹന്നാന്‍ മെത്രാന്‍ തീരുമാനിച്ചു. തമസിയ്‌ക്കാതെ അമ്പഴക്കാട്ട്‌ ഒരു കന്യകാമഠം സ്ഥാപിച്ച്‌ ആ വികാരിയാത്തില്‍പ്പെട്ട കന്യാസ്‌ത്രീകളെ അങ്ങോട്ട്‌ കൊണ്ടുവന്നു. 1897- മെയ്‌ 9 അമ്പഴക്കാട്ടുവെച്ച്‌ ശിരോവസ്‌ത്രം സ്ഥീകരിച്ചതോടെ റോസ കര്‍മ്മലസഭയിലെ സി. എവുപ്രാസ്യായായി.
രോഗങ്ങളും ക്ലേശങ്ങളും ഒന്നിനൊന്ന്‌ കൂടിവന്നു. 1900 മെയ്‌ 24ന്‌ ഒല്ലൂര്‍ മഠം സ്ഥാപിച്ചപ്പോള്‍ സി. എവുപ്രാസ്യ ഒല്ലൂര്‍ മഠാംഗമായി. താമസിയാതെതന്നെ നവസന്യാസ പരിശീലന ചുമതല അധികാരികള്‍ ആ മാതൃകാ സന്യാസിനിയെ എല്‌പിച്ചു. നീണ്ട 13 വര്‍ഷത്തോളും ഈ ജോലി ഏറ്റവും സ്‌തുത്യര്‍ഹമാംവിധം എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ നിര്‍വ്വഹിച്ചു. തുടര്‍ന്ന്‌ മഠാധിപയായി. തന്നെ ഏല്‌പിച്ച ജോലികള്‍ നൂറുശതമാനം ആത്മാര്‍ത്ഥതയോടെ നിര്‍വ്വഹിച്ചു. ഒരു അമ്മയുടെ സ്‌നേഹം കൊടുത്ത്‌ കൊച്ചുസഹോദരിമാരെ പരിശീലിപ്പിച്ചു. താന്‍ ജീവിച്ചത്‌ മാത്രം ശീലിക്കുവാന്‍ അവരെ പഠിപ്പിച്ചു. ദൈവസ്‌നേഹത്തിലും പരസ്‌നേഹത്തിലും പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥനാചൈതന്യത്തിലും വളരാന്‍ അവരെ സ്വന്തം ജീവിതത്തിലൂടെ പ്രേരിപ്പിച്ചു. തന്നേക്കാളുപരിയായി തന്റെ സഹോദരങ്ങളെ സ്‌നേഹിച്ച ആ അമ്മ, വേദനയനുഭവിക്കുന്നവര്‍ക്കുവേണ്‌ടി രാവും പകലും ഊണും ഉറക്കവുമുപേക്ഷിച്ച്‌ ദിവ്യനാഥന്റെയടുക്കല്‍ തപസ്സിരുന്നു. അവരുടെ വേദന സ്വന്തം ഹൃദയത്തില്‍ ഏറ്റെടുത്ത്‌ തിരുസന്നിധിയിലര്‍പ്പിച്ചു. നല്ലവനായ ദൈവം അതിന്‌ നൂറുമേനി ഫലവും നല്‌കി.
എന്റെ ദൈവവിളി സ്‌നേഹമാണ്‌ എന്ന്‌ കൊച്ചുത്രേസ്യ പറഞ്ഞതുപോലെ, എന്റെ ദൈവവിളി സഹനമാണ്‌ എന്ന്‌ എവുപ്രാസിയാമ്മ സ്വന്തം ജീവിതത്തിലൂടെ കാണിച്ചുതന്നു. നീ എന്നെ സ്‌നേഹിക്കുന്നുവോ എന്ന്‌ വി. പത്രോസിനോടുളള യേശുവിന്റെ ചോദ്യത്തിന്റെ ശരിയായ ധ്വനി, നീ എനിക്കുവേണ്ടി ത്യാഗം ഏറ്റെടുക്കുവാന്‍ സന്നദ്ധനാണോ എന്നാണ്‌. അത്‌ അതിന്റെ പൂര്‍ണ്ണതയില്‍ മനസ്സിലാക്കിയ അമ്മ, സഹനങ്ങളും ത്യാഗങ്ങളും സ്വയം ഏറ്റെടുത്ത്‌ യേശുവിന്റെ മുമ്പില്‍ സമര്‍പ്പിച്ചു.
ദൈവതിരുമനസ്സിനോടുളള വിധേയത്വം അധികാരികളെ അനുസരിക്കുന്നതിലും നിയമങ്ങള്‍ കൃത്യമായി അനുഷ്‌ഠിക്കുന്നതിലും അമ്മ പ്രകടമാക്കി. ദാരിദ്ര്യാരൂപിയോടുളള അമ്മയുടെ സ്‌നേഹം എളിമയുടെയും വിനയത്തിന്റെയും പ്രവര്‍ത്തകളില്‍ മുറ്റിനിന്നു. എളിമപ്പെടാനും കുറ്റപ്പെടുത്തപ്പെടാനും വളരെയധികം ആഗ്രഹിച്ചു. വ്രത-ത്രയങ്ങളിലൂടെ യേശുനാഥന്‌ സമ്പൂര്‍ണ്ണ സമര്‍പ്പണം ചെയ്‌തവളാണ്‌ ഈ സമര്‍പ്പിത. സമൃദ്ധമായ സ്‌നേഹത്തില്‍നിന്ന്‌ വരുന്ന വലിയ സമ്പത്താണ്‌ ബ്രഹ്മചര്യമെന്ന്‌ എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ കണ്‌ടു. ഞാന്‍ എന്തായിരിക്കുന്നുവോ അത്‌ ദൈവകൃപയാലാണ്‌. തനിക്ക്‌ കിട്ടിയിരിക്കുന്നതെല്ലാം ദാനമാണ്‌. ദൈവം മാത്രംമതിയെന്ന ചിന്തയോടെ എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മ ജീവിച്ചു. ഈശോയാകുന്ന മരത്തില്‍ പടര്‍ന്നു കിടന്ന വളളിയായിരുന്നു എവുപ്രാസ്യാ. ഓരോ വ്യക്തിക്കും തന്റെ ജീവിതമാകുന്ന ചിത്രം നന്നാക്കണമെങ്കില്‍ അതിന്റെ ദാതാവിനെ അറിയണം, കാണണം, അനുഭവിക്കണം, സ്വന്തമാക്കണം. ദൈവത്തെ സ്‌നേഹിക്കാത്ത ഒരു വ്യക്തിക്കും തന്റെ ജീവിത ചിത്രം ഭംഗിയായി വരയ്‌ക്കുവാന്‍ സാധിക്കില്ല. നാലു ചുവരുകള്‍ക്കകത്തിരുന്ന്‌ നിശബ്ദമായ സ്‌നേഹ സേവന ത്യാഗത്തിലൂടെ എവുപ്രാസ്യയാമ്മ തന്റെ ജീവിതം ഏറ്റവും മികവുറ്റതാക്കി. ദൈവപിതാവിന്റെ കരതണലില്‍ വിരിഞ്ഞ്‌, ദൈവീക സൗരഭ്യത്തെ ചുറ്റും പരത്തി, ദൈവീക മഹിമക്കായി എടുത്തുവെയ്‌ക്കപ്പെട്ട ജീവിതം.
തന്റെ ജീവിതത്തിലെ ഓരോ നിമിഷവും കയ്‌പ്പുനിറഞ്ഞതെങ്കിലും ആ ഭക്ഷണത്തെ അവള്‍ രുചിച്ചിറക്കി. മണിക്കുറുകള്‍ പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥനയില്‍ മുഴുകി ''പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥിക്കുന്ന അമ്മ''യുടെ അടുത്ത്‌ ജനങ്ങള്‍ ഓടിക്കുടി. അങ്ങനെ മലയില്‍ ഉയിര്‍ത്തപ്പെട്ട പട്ടണംപോലെ, പീഠത്തിന്‍മേല്‍ ഉയര്‍ത്തിയ ദീപംപോലെ, സകലര്‍ക്കും പ്രകാശം ചൊരിഞ്ഞ്‌, അവള്‍ പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥനയുടെ പ്രേക്ഷിതയായി. കൂദാശകളില്‍ ഭക്തിപൂര്‍വ്വം പങ്കുകൊണ്ടു. സുകൃതജപങ്ങളുടെ ഏഴുകൊന്ത അനുദിനം ജപിച്ചു.സ്വന്തം മുറി പലപ്പോഴും ഒരു അള്‍ത്താരയായി മാറ്റപ്പെട്ടു. എപ്പോഴും മറ്റുളളവര്‍ക്കായിരിക്കണം പരിഗണനയും മുന്‍ഗണനയും എന്ന്‌ അമ്മയ്‌ക്ക്‌ നിര്‍ബന്ധമായിരുന്നു. കോളറ, ക്ഷയം, എന്നി മാരകമായ രോഗം പിടിപ്പെട്ടവരെ സ്വന്തം മക്കളെപ്പോലെ അടുത്തിരുന്ന്‌ ശുശ്രൂഷിച്ച വീരോചിത മനുഷ്യ സ്‌നേഹിയാണ്‌ എവുപ്രാസ്യയാമ്മ.
കുരിശിനെയും സഹനത്തെയും കുറിച്ച്‌ അവള്‍ക്ക്‌ ഒരു പ്രത്യേക കാഴ്‌ചപ്പാടുണ്‌ടായിരുന്നു. Suffering is a part of Vocation: നമ്മുടെ ഓരോരുത്തരുടെയും ദൈവവിളിയുടെ ഭാഗമാണ്‌ സഹനം. ശിഷ്യത്വത്തിലേക്കുളള വിളി കുരിശെടുക്കാനുളള വിളിയാണ്‌. സഹനത്തിലേക്കും മരണത്തിലേക്കും അതുവഴിയുളള ഉയര്‍പ്പിലേയ്‌ക്കുമാണ്‌ ഓരോരുത്തരേയും യേശുവിളിക്കുന്നത്‌. അമ്മയും സഹനത്തിലൂടെ മഹത്വത്തിലേയ്‌ക്കുയര്‍ന്നവളാണ്‌. കുരിശിലാണ്‌ ഓരോരുത്തരുടേയും രക്ഷ. എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മയുടെ ജീവിതത്തിലെ ഏറ്റവും ആശ്വാസകരമായ നിമിഷങ്ങള്‍ അവള്‍ ക്രൂശിതരൂപത്തെ നോക്കിനിന്നവയായിരുന്നു. അമ്മയ്‌ക്ക്‌ ഏറ്റവും ഇഷ്ടപ്പെട്ട ഒരു സകൃതമാണ്‌ ''അങ്ങയുടെ പീഡാനുഭവത്തില്‍ എന്നെയും പങ്കുകാരിയാക്കണമെ'' എന്നത്‌. അതുപോലെ തന്റെ ജീവിതക്ലേശങ്ങളും അനുദിനവേദനകളും കര്‍ത്താവിന്റെ പീഡകളോട്‌ ചേര്‍ത്ത്‌ കാഴ്‌ചവെയ്‌ക്കുന്നതിലും ഈ അമ്മ സന്തോഷം കണ്ടു. കുരിശില്ലാതെ കിരിടമില്ലെന്ന്‌ വളരെ ആഴത്തില്‍ ഗ്രഹിച്ചിരുന്ന ഈ സഹനദാസി, താനുമായി ബന്ധപ്പെടുന്നവരിലേയ്‌ക്കും ഈ മഹത്‌സന്ദേശം പകര്‍ന്നുകൊടുത്തു.
വിഷാദിച്ചുനടന്നിരുന്ന ഒരു സഹോദരിയോട ്‌ അവള്‍ പറയുന്നത്‌ കേള്‍ക്കുക: ''മകളെ, ഒന്നുകൊണ്ടും നിരാശപ്പെടേണ്ട. വളരെ സന്തോഷവതിയായിരിക്കുക. ഇതില്‍നിന്നോക്കെ വലിയ നേട്ടങ്ങള്‍ ഉണ്‌ടാക്കാന്‍ പരിശ്രമിക്കണം. ഇതൊക്കെ തമ്പുരാന്‍ അറിഞ്ഞ്‌ തരുന്നതാണ്‌. നീ എപ്പോഴും ഈ കുരിശിലേയ്‌ക്ക്‌ നോക്കൂ. നിന്റെത്‌ എത്രനിസാരമാണ്‌''.
വാതം അടക്കമുളള അസുഖങ്ങള്‍ അവളുടെ അഗ്നിപരീക്ഷകളായിരുന്നു. കര്‍മ്മലാരാമത്തില്‍ സഹനങ്ങളും വേദനകളുമായിരുന്നു ആ പനിനീര്‍ പുഷ്‌പത്തിന്‌ ലഭിച്ച വെളളവും വളവും. മറ്റുളളവരെ കാണിക്കാന്‍ ചെയ്‌തുകുട്ടുന്ന പണ്യങ്ങള്‍ എന്ന വിധിവാചകകങ്ങള്‍, അസ്‌ത്രങ്ങളായി അവളുടെ കര്‍ണ്ണപുടങ്ങളില്‍ ആഞ്ഞുപതിച്ചപ്പോഴും അവള്‍ ചഞ്ചലിച്ചില്ല. കുറ്റാരോപണം നടത്തിയ സഹോദരിയെ ഏറ്റവും ഹൃദയസ്‌പര്‍ശിയായ വിധത്തില്‍ സ്‌നേഹിക്കാനും ശുശ്രൂഷിക്കാനും അവര്‍ക്കു കഴിഞ്ഞു. തന്റെ ജീവിതം മുഴുവന്‍ അവിടുത്തെ മുമ്പില്‍ ഒരു കാണിക്കയായി സമര്‍പ്പിച്ച്‌ സ്വയം ഒരു ബലിവസ്‌തുവായി മാറി. ഇതാണ്‌ എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മയുടെ ജീവിത വിശുദ്ധിയുടെ രഹസ്യം.
അല്‌പം ദീര്‍ഘമായിരുന്നെങ്കിലും നിശബ്ദജീവിതം നയിച്ച്‌ തന്റെ ഓട്ടം പൂര്‍ത്തിയാക്കി. വരും തലമുറയ്‌ക്ക്‌ കൂടുതല്‍ ദൈവീക ചൈതന്യവും ആദ്ധ്യാത്മിക സമ്പത്തും പ്രദാനംചെയത്‌ കര്‍മ്മലാരാമത്തിലെ ആ പുഷ്‌പം 1952 ആഗസ്റ്റ്‌ 29-ാം തിയതി രാത്രി 8.40 ന്‌ 'മരിച്ചാലും മറക്കില്ലാട്ടോ' എന്ന സ്‌നേഹമന്ത്രവുമായി ഈ ലോകം വെടിഞ്ഞു. മരണശേഷം ആ അമ്മയുടെ വിശുദ്ധി നാടെങ്ങും പരന്നു. അമ്മയുടെ മാദ്ധ്യസ്ഥ്യം തേടിയ അനേകര്‍ക്ക്‌ സൗഖ്യം ലഭിച്ചു. മാരകമായ രോഗങ്ങളില്‍ നിന്ന്‌ മുക്തി ലഭിച്ചു. അങ്ങനെ 1987 ആഗസ്‌റ്റ്‌ 29-ാം തിയതി ജോണ്‍പോള്‍ രണ്‌ടാമന്‍ മാര്‍പ്പാപ്പ അമ്മയെ ദൈവദാസിയായും 2002 ജൂലൈ 5-ന്‌ ധന്യയായും പ്രഖ്യാപിച്ചു. 2006 ഡിസംബര്‍ 3-ന്‌ ബെനഡിക്‌റ്റ്‌ 16-ാമന്‍ മാര്‍പാപ്പ അവളെ വാഴ്‌ത്തപ്പെട്ടവരുടെ ഗണത്തിലേക്ക്‌ ഉയര്‍ത്തി. ഈ കനകദീപം ഇന്ന്‌ സ്വര്‍ഗ്ഗത്തില്‍ നിന്ന്‌ കൂടുതല്‍ പ്രഭയോടെ പ്രകാശിക്കുന്നു. അതിന്റെ പ്രഭ ഇന്നും ഒല്ലൂരിലുളള അമ്മയുടെ കല്ലറയില്‍ നിന്ന്‌ പ്രതിഫലിച്ചുകൊണ്‌ടിരിക്കുന്നു. അമ്മയുടെ മരണദിവസമായ ആഗസ്റ്റ്‌ 29ന്‌ അവളുടെ തിരുന്നാള്‍ കൊണ്‌ടാടുന്നു.
സ്വന്തം ജീവിതത്തെ ദൈവോന്മുഖവും പരോന്മുഖവുമാക്കിമാറ്റി വിശുദ്ധിയുടെ ഉന്നത സോപാനങ്ങളിലേക്കുയര്‍ന്ന ഈ വിനിത കന്യകയുടെ ജീവസുറ്റ മാതൃക നമുക്കും ഏറ്റുവാങ്ങാം. വിശുദ്ധിയുടെ ഗണത്തിലേക്ക്‌ എത്രയും വേഗം അമ്മ ഉയര്‍ത്തപ്പെടട്ടെ എന്ന്‌ നമുക്ക്‌ പ്രര്‍ത്ഥിക്കാം. കര്‍മ്മല സൂനമേ, എവുപ്രാസ്യാമ്മേ, ഞങ്ങള്‍ക്കായി പ്രര്‍ത്ഥിക്കണമേ.

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